It's April!!!

Usually, that would mean rain, right? Well, not in Colorado! Here, it's sunny one day and snowing the next. Really, my friends and I have been switching off eating inside and outside all week because one day it's beautiful and sunny and the next we'd freeze to death if we tried to eat outside!

So, for English class, we are now reading Romeo and Juliet. I love Shakespeare, though I will admit that R & J is not my favorite play of his--I love his comedies, Richard the Third, and Macbeth. But, I still think I'm going to enjoy it most out of all the books we've read this year, because I'll actually want to keep up with the reading. Anyway, as a part of this unit, we also have a Shakespeare festival project, in which we have groups and choose a play of Shakespeare's to perform (in front of a PLETHORA of people), plus some analyzing of our play (editing lines, etc), costumes, props, rehearsals, memorization, good portrayal...And it's worth about 500 to 600 points total! Okay, but I'm not too worried about that because I have a group of friends that I trust to do the work well and everything, and I'm pretty sure we're either performing a scene from Much Ado About Nothing or The Merry Wives of Windsor.

What is bothering me is that today I brought in my Yale Shakespeare: Complete Works. It's gigantic, but I told my group I would bring it so we could look at the plays (turns out there wasn't much point, since we didn't get to the play, just read Romeo and Juliet in class). Well, everyone in my English class kept staring at me like I was crazy--a few of my friends not in the class thought it was amazing, though. Since I've been so close to tears lately, I almost started crying. Yes, I know I'm different from most of my English class in that I love reading and books and writing and analyzing and school and learning, but some of the looks people gave me or the things they said really hurt deep down. *sigh*

And, see, this is why I really, really want to go to Fountain Valley. I feel incredibly selfish...and it does seem pretty impossible right now. But I think I would thrive there, with the close-knit community and the comprehensive classes and the peers who actually want to learn like I do. Kate called me during English (I didn't answer) about whether or not I was going to go, and I don't know what to do. Of course I do, but it doesn't seem like we have the money at the moment. *bigger, upset sigh*

Since Leslie asked me to make this, here is a list of certain things I don't like about Rampart that I am almost completely sure would be better at FVS:

• The class size. It's way too big, and often I feel completely lost in the classroom, especially with my shyness
• The community in the school--it isn't very close or personal or accommodating, if you really think about it. The majority of the teachers don't care about their students other than when/what they are doing in their particular class. It's too competitive for my liking, definitely, and just the overall atmosphere isn't great to me. At Fountain Valley, which is much smaller, teachers focus on their students and most are sports coaches--you even have one faculty member who is your adviser, and really wants to get to know you and what is going on in your life
• The majority of my peers (pay close attention to the word majority, not all) do not give a crap about school, other than like, "Oh, if I get all Bs, my parents will let me start driving!" The motivation to learn and apply what you are learning to your life and your future isn't there in most people, even though the IB program supposedly focuses on that
• I don't feel like I'm learning anything of much importance, and most of my classes are way to easy and basic, even certain of the IB ones. I'm not getting the English and Science classes I would like, because the teachers have a "priority" to focus on the students who are confused or doing worse or, excuse the slight rudeness, not as smart
• Overall, I'm just not happy there at all, for the reasons listed above as well as a few others like the sports teams, the lack of "community involvement," and a lot of the teachers...

The list doesn't necessarily end there, but you get the idea, I think.

Well, I am glad it is spring though. It's sunny, flowers are blooming, most of the time it's warmer. Only downside is that my allergies are coming back full force! But I'll survive, as those are really the absolute least of my problems at the moment. Well, to anyone who actually bothers to read this (which is probably no one): I hope you are having a better time at the moment than I am and I wish you much love and happiness in all aspects of your life! Cheers!