06 January 2008


Okay, so let's see if anyone can figure out what I'm talking about. Small hint: It has to do with one of my big loves (not a person, a thing). Hem, Hem:

I'm friends with both of y'all in some way, but you hate her. You hate her just because she got the guy of your dreams, the one you wanted for yourself. But, honey, just a little reality check here. You would've gone out with him for maybe a few months, but I doubt you would've had the same strong relationship that she has with him. She's loved him since she first saw him that day at the station, and she never gave up on him, despite the guys she was with before him. And, honey, she caught his attention in a way you never could, and he caught her attention. He saved her life, sacrificed himself for her, and won her heart. She almost died because of him, never gave up, and finally won his heart. Through all the hardships, the tension, and the danger, they loved each other with a passion that's hard to come by. He had a difficult journey, and perhaps the hardest part was being away from her. He only broke up with her once, without him wanting to, to protect her life. She's kind and she's strong. She's sweet and funny. She's smart and brave. She's scared for him and wishes she could be with him the whole way. She's beautiful in so many ways. She's in love and, most important of all, she's HIS. And you hate her. Why? Because you're jealous, and it's getting in the way of you seeing her good qualities and realising that she's a good person. He's wonderful to her; she's wonderful to him. Together, they are one of the most brilliant couples the world has ever seen. Every time I see them or think about them, I smile. So you need to face the facts: The two of them are perfect for each other, and your petty jealousy won't change that. Even if you can't get over it (which is hard to believe), don't talk about it everywhere you go. Keep it within your group of people who feel the same way. Don't go rubbing it in the faces of people who like her. And don't criticize me for being her friend. It's not my fault you can't see past your jealousy the beautiful, strong person she is. I'm not letting you change me or letting your feelings get in the way of my friendship with her. And if you don't hear me this final time, I'm cutting you off. So, please don't come back to me begging for forgiveness when you come to your senses. Because, honey, I've had enough.

Okay, so some parts of this rant can be seen in different ways, but the purpose I wrote it for is kind of hard to find :) See if you can! If you think you did, send me a message.

Love and happiness,

04 January 2008

A New Year and some Happy News

All right, so I probably should have done this a long time ago, but...well, these are my ups and downs from 2007:

Best: Joining Leaky/The Year of Potter/reading Deathly Hallows: Well, this probably doesn't need much explanation, but that really was one of the best times of my life so far! Finally reading those long awaited first words of Deathly Hallows, talking about it on here, discovering PotterCast...*sigh* So happy. Leaky and the Lounge have helped me get through so many things this year, and I've met so many great people that I hope I will stay friends with for the rest of my life! It was great to find a whole forum of Potter obsessed people. Mary Rose and Allie have been especially great!
Pirates of Penzance Play: This was the play that my broadway class put on at the end of 8th grade (in May). And it was really one of the funnest times of my middle school...career, you could say. For once I actually had friends that I could talk with and laugh with. And, I was actually getting some attention for my singing and dancing ability--I even got to choreograph some of the dances! We all had so much fun, so many inside jokes, and so many laughs.
Stepmom moving here: Well, it just made me so happy. I missed her a lot. We had a good time after Thanksgiving break. It was odd at first to think I had her for as long as I wanted and we didn't have to try to work things into a week or whatever schedule. But, now I'm loving it :D
New England Trip: So amazing. First trip my dad, sister, stepmom, and I had actually taken as a family where none of us were in our home, all of us staying in a hotel. I had the most amazing time, especially in Wood's Hole and New York.
Homecoming: Just so fun Again, I actually had friends. We all went to dinner and danced for hours. I got to be with my friends that I didn't see often because either 1. I didn't have any classes or 2. They moved high schools but still came to homecoming.
Deciding I was going to apply to Fountain Valley/my results on the SSAT test: Well, it was an accomplishment for me. My results on the admission test were amazing, and I was just proud of myself for finally coming out and saying, "Dad, I want this," because usually I have a hard time expressing what I want. I'm hoping I get in, because I'll be much happier there than at my current high school.

Worst: Well, some of these I really don't feel like sharing, because they are kind of personal and I've really only shared them with my journal and my 8th grade English teacher, but...
Relationship with my mom: It has been rocky for 4 years, and I had been sitting there trying my hardest to be understanding and loving and patch up our relationship, and I hadn't gotten anything back from her. Finally, Thanksgiving of 2006, I just snapped. And after that, we barely talked for a really long time. I think our lack of talking (besides saying "here's dinner" or "I need money for a field trip" or "I need something from my dad's") lasted until March. But even then I didn't make a point of talking to her and I was just miserable. It got considerably worse on July 11th (yes, right after seeing OotP ), and I stopped talking to her again. She still wasn't making an effort to care for me, and I had actually heard her say "I only keep her for the child support money." I was devastated and hurt and...well, you know. Living at her house was then miserable because I had no one to talk to. It's gotten a little better now, but it's not much past that state it was in March through July. And I still hate going to her house and try to do everything I can to get away (go out with friends).
My Birthday: Sadly, yes. One of the hardest days of 2007, actually. Because my dad had to be in New York to get interview for this documentary about Iraq. I was supposed to be at his house for my birthday, but I had to stay at my mom's. Which, needless to say, was...HORRIBLE, especially because it was in the November-March not talking point. And only one of my friends remembered by himself that it was my birthday. I was crushed, upset, lonely, and stressed out from all the homework and projects our teachers had given us...
Thanksgiving: Except for the first weekend and Thanksgiving day, it was a pretty bad break. I had so much homework that I had to do and it didn't feel like break at all because I'd get up and immediately start doing homework.
Friends: Or..."friends." See, I know perfectly well that I am the Luna of my school. But I had a pretty good small group of friends. Now, a lot of them have drifted away from me at the start of high school and ignore me now. And no one really seems to want to do anything with me, yet they still say I'm their friend. I'm just sick of it.

Okay, so now onto the Happy News/Day. Well, I'll start with the day. Today I went on a French club field trip to an exhibit on loan from the Louvre with stuff from Versailles that was incredibly interesting. Then, we went to a French restaurant where we spoke in French most of the time, ate amazing vegetable ravioli and scrumptious chocolate mousse =D Even the bus ride back was entertaining because we got caught in traffic and watched all the litter in the median and...found some pretty odd and amazing stuff!!

So, for the Happy News. It is about 75% certain that I am going to Terminus this summer!!! We just have to work out the dates with my mom so that I can go with my stepmom, but she is usually really understanding with switching dates and everything. Plus, as an added bonus, Mary Rose might be coming with me/staying in the same room, too!

So, yep, I'm very happy today!