Jealousy

Okay, so let's see if anyone can figure out what I'm talking about. Small hint: It has to do with one of my big loves (not a person, a thing). Hem, Hem:

I'm friends with both of y'all in some way, but you hate her. You hate her just because she got the guy of your dreams, the one you wanted for yourself. But, honey, just a little reality check here. You would've gone out with him for maybe a few months, but I doubt you would've had the same strong relationship that she has with him. She's loved him since she first saw him that day at the station, and she never gave up on him, despite the guys she was with before him. And, honey, she caught his attention in a way you never could, and he caught her attention. He saved her life, sacrificed himself for her, and won her heart. She almost died because of him, never gave up, and finally won his heart. Through all the hardships, the tension, and the danger, they loved each other with a passion that's hard to come by. He had a difficult journey, and perhaps the hardest part was being away from her. He only broke up with her once, without him wanting to, to protect her life. She's kind and she's strong. She's sweet and funny. She's smart and brave. She's scared for him and wishes she could be with him the whole way. She's beautiful in so many ways. She's in love and, most important of all, she's HIS. And you hate her. Why? Because you're jealous, and it's getting in the way of you seeing her good qualities and realising that she's a good person. He's wonderful to her; she's wonderful to him. Together, they are one of the most brilliant couples the world has ever seen. Every time I see them or think about them, I smile. So you need to face the facts: The two of them are perfect for each other, and your petty jealousy won't change that. Even if you can't get over it (which is hard to believe), don't talk about it everywhere you go. Keep it within your group of people who feel the same way. Don't go rubbing it in the faces of people who like her. And don't criticize me for being her friend. It's not my fault you can't see past your jealousy the beautiful, strong person she is. I'm not letting you change me or letting your feelings get in the way of my friendship with her. And if you don't hear me this final time, I'm cutting you off. So, please don't come back to me begging for forgiveness when you come to your senses. Because, honey, I've had enough.

Okay, so some parts of this rant can be seen in different ways, but the purpose I wrote it for is kind of hard to find :) See if you can! If you think you did, send me a message.

Love and happiness,
Kat

A New Year and some Happy News

All right, so I probably should have done this a long time ago, but...well, these are my ups and downs from 2007:

Best: Joining Leaky/The Year of Potter/reading Deathly Hallows: Well, this probably doesn't need much explanation, but that really was one of the best times of my life so far! Finally reading those long awaited first words of Deathly Hallows, talking about it on here, discovering PotterCast...*sigh* So happy. Leaky and the Lounge have helped me get through so many things this year, and I've met so many great people that I hope I will stay friends with for the rest of my life! It was great to find a whole forum of Potter obsessed people. Mary Rose and Allie have been especially great!
Pirates of Penzance Play: This was the play that my broadway class put on at the end of 8th grade (in May). And it was really one of the funnest times of my middle school...career, you could say. For once I actually had friends that I could talk with and laugh with. And, I was actually getting some attention for my singing and dancing ability--I even got to choreograph some of the dances! We all had so much fun, so many inside jokes, and so many laughs.
Stepmom moving here: Well, it just made me so happy. I missed her a lot. We had a good time after Thanksgiving break. It was odd at first to think I had her for as long as I wanted and we didn't have to try to work things into a week or whatever schedule. But, now I'm loving it :D
New England Trip: So amazing. First trip my dad, sister, stepmom, and I had actually taken as a family where none of us were in our home, all of us staying in a hotel. I had the most amazing time, especially in Wood's Hole and New York.
Homecoming: Just so fun Again, I actually had friends. We all went to dinner and danced for hours. I got to be with my friends that I didn't see often because either 1. I didn't have any classes or 2. They moved high schools but still came to homecoming.
Deciding I was going to apply to Fountain Valley/my results on the SSAT test: Well, it was an accomplishment for me. My results on the admission test were amazing, and I was just proud of myself for finally coming out and saying, "Dad, I want this," because usually I have a hard time expressing what I want. I'm hoping I get in, because I'll be much happier there than at my current high school.

Worst: Well, some of these I really don't feel like sharing, because they are kind of personal and I've really only shared them with my journal and my 8th grade English teacher, but...
Relationship with my mom: It has been rocky for 4 years, and I had been sitting there trying my hardest to be understanding and loving and patch up our relationship, and I hadn't gotten anything back from her. Finally, Thanksgiving of 2006, I just snapped. And after that, we barely talked for a really long time. I think our lack of talking (besides saying "here's dinner" or "I need money for a field trip" or "I need something from my dad's") lasted until March. But even then I didn't make a point of talking to her and I was just miserable. It got considerably worse on July 11th (yes, right after seeing OotP ), and I stopped talking to her again. She still wasn't making an effort to care for me, and I had actually heard her say "I only keep her for the child support money." I was devastated and hurt and...well, you know. Living at her house was then miserable because I had no one to talk to. It's gotten a little better now, but it's not much past that state it was in March through July. And I still hate going to her house and try to do everything I can to get away (go out with friends).
My Birthday: Sadly, yes. One of the hardest days of 2007, actually. Because my dad had to be in New York to get interview for this documentary about Iraq. I was supposed to be at his house for my birthday, but I had to stay at my mom's. Which, needless to say, was...HORRIBLE, especially because it was in the November-March not talking point. And only one of my friends remembered by himself that it was my birthday. I was crushed, upset, lonely, and stressed out from all the homework and projects our teachers had given us...
Thanksgiving: Except for the first weekend and Thanksgiving day, it was a pretty bad break. I had so much homework that I had to do and it didn't feel like break at all because I'd get up and immediately start doing homework.
Friends: Or..."friends." See, I know perfectly well that I am the Luna of my school. But I had a pretty good small group of friends. Now, a lot of them have drifted away from me at the start of high school and ignore me now. And no one really seems to want to do anything with me, yet they still say I'm their friend. I'm just sick of it.

Okay, so now onto the Happy News/Day. Well, I'll start with the day. Today I went on a French club field trip to an exhibit on loan from the Louvre with stuff from Versailles that was incredibly interesting. Then, we went to a French restaurant where we spoke in French most of the time, ate amazing vegetable ravioli and scrumptious chocolate mousse =D Even the bus ride back was entertaining because we got caught in traffic and watched all the litter in the median and...found some pretty odd and amazing stuff!!

So, for the Happy News. It is about 75% certain that I am going to Terminus this summer!!! We just have to work out the dates with my mom so that I can go with my stepmom, but she is usually really understanding with switching dates and everything. Plus, as an added bonus, Mary Rose might be coming with me/staying in the same room, too!

So, yep, I'm very happy today!

Happy Holidays!

Happy Yule, Christmas, Hannakah, Kwanzaa, whatever. And, to quote GalleryCast, "if you believe nothing, Happy day." :) Well, so I opened most of my presents on Saturday, cause that was Yule, my religious winter holiday. Then, we opened the presents from my aunt and uncle on Monday because we always go up to Denver or Winter Park to visit them. And I got the presents from my mom today. Just in case the incredibly small amount of people who read this want to know, this is what I got: Books (yes, all of which were on my list): The Jungle Book, The Importance of Being Earnest, Wind in the Willows, Watership Down, Anna Karenina, Great Expectations, Wickett's Remedy, Peter and the Starcatchers, and Wife in the Fast Lane. HP Merchandise: The Psychology of Harry Potter (amazing book), DA sketch shirt, Harry Potter Gryffindor shirt, Order of the Phoenix DVD, and HP calendar Other: money, Wet Seal Gift card, Gilmore Girls Season 7 on DVD and a few repeat books that I'll return sometime and get different books or maybe a DVD or two I am very happy with all of it. So, I hope y'all had an amazing holiday season...but it's not over yet! We still have New year to look forward too! Much love!!!

Oh, Happy Day!

SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!! OMG, the moment we've waited for for such a long time is here! JO is going to be on PotterCast! Isn't it just so amazing? :) I only wish I were John, Sue, or Melissa... Huh, so that's the most exciting thing that's happened in my life lately. I finished finals on Friday, and so far I have all A's. I'm still waiting for two of my grades to come back, but I'm pretty confident in them...I've mostly just sat around and read a lot since school ended for WINTER BREAK. Only 5 days until Yule, and still a blissful 17 days of freedom ahead of me! Indeed. A very happy day, today is. :D

Random Hary Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone thoughts...

Yep. I watched it today with the PC commentary, trying to avoid finals :D Here y'all go (and sorry for the huge lack of posting): Random Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone movie thoughts Oh, I love the Diagon Alley music. *gasp* C’est Hedwig! And, wow, doesn’t Gringotts look funny? Like the Leaning Tower of Pisa or something…Okay, I want all that money. Lucky, lucky Harry. 713, two vaults away from Sirius’. But it’s just a little package…VERY suspicious. *wink* Aww, ickle Danny: a wand. He sounds so adorable! Yeah, will Ollivander be back? He better, but I don’t recall seeing his name on the cast list. “After all, He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, did great things. Terrible. But great.” Don’t die, Hedwig!!!!!! THE BOY WHO LIVED! *la gasp* Hermione...you're going to marry Ro-on!!!!!!!! Teehee. HUFFLEPUFF!!!!!!!!!! S.Q.U.E.E. Hah! Another Weasley, I know just what to do with you! LOL. Funny floating candles...WE GOT POTTER!!!!!!!! Aww, Harry and Hedwig. :) Oh, come on, Snape! Harry’s just taking notes! Bezoar—pay attention, Harry! It will save Ron’s life someday! Oh, wow, the ceiling of the Great Hall looks so cool in this movie! Ha! Fred got something from Mummy! LOL, I love Ron’s faces in this movie. Harry’s first time on a broom! SQUEE! And Ron’s hit him in the face. :) Poor ickle Neville… “What an idiot.” Bahahahahaha! Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!!!!!! Harry caught the Remembrall. OMG, Wood. He’s so hot. The Grey Lady, wow. And, gasp, Hermione’s stalking Harry. “This is the third floor.” Woooood!!!!!!!! Seriously, I am in love with him. But you know, he held it in his hand in the movie. So that totally messes up the whole book seven plot. <_< LOL, Seamus’ hair. But poor ickle Hermione. Ron didn’t mean it, sweetie! He loves you! He’s gonna marry you! TROLL!!!!!!!!!!! “Thought you ought to know.” Seriously, who are half of these students? They’re so random! “I think the troll’s left the dungeon.” No doy, Ron. OMG Melissa—Shrek was cuter. Goodness. Oh, yes, Harry. Those ickle rocks are really going to help. *rolls eyes* Yes, Ron, COOL. Oh, wow, FIVE points. So amazing. Uh huh. Okay, this is one of my favorite lines: “I don’t really remember. I took a bludger to the head two minutes in. Woke up in the hospital a week later.” Alas, very comforting. I really love watching Quidditch though. And I’m glad they are leaving it in Half Blood Prince, cause I really wanted it in Order of the Phoenix. Angelina! See, why couldn’t they let her be captain? Hey, are you allowed to kick your opponents? Luna’s commentary better be in, and McLaggen. NO!!!!! Wood!!!! How sad. That should so totally be against the rules. I don’t think they are actually allowed to do that. Honestly, these stupid mean Slytherins. Angelina and Wood are trying to play fair and they aren’t even using talents, just being all intimidating. That broom stuff looks so uncomfortable and sickening…No wonder everyone thought he was puking when he got down. Alan Rickman looked particularly good looking when he flipped his hair off his face like that. Surfing on a broom…uh huh. Dan’s blue eyes still bug me. I mean, what are they going to do for the whole “look at me” scene? Will it just be that Lily had blue eyes? Urgh…why couldn’t Dan where contacts, especially now that he’s 18!? GO, GO, GRYFFINDOR! GO, GO, GRYFFINDOR! GO, GO, GRYFFINDOR! “That thing has a name?” “Shouldn’t have said that.” I love that about Hagrid. Snow! Hey, that’s like outside right now. In my town, anyway. (Note to self: an hour left in movie) “That’s totally barbaric.” Funny. I wouldn’t think an eleven-year old would say that, but it’s Hermione. I want a Weasley sweater. Or, better yet, I want to learn how to make one. Dear Harry: Here’s a Deathly Hallow. You deserve it. I don’t. I’m stuck with the f---ing Elder Wand. Sincerely, Dumbledore. LOL. OH, how creepy, it’s Harry’s arm just floating along there. I wonder if that filmy covering is really there in Harry’s view when he’s under the cloak. *crash* Filch: “You can’t hide!” Harry: “Yes I can, I’ve got this amazing Deathly Hallow. My daddy left it to me.” CRYSTAL!!!!!!!!!!!! =D No, Quirrell, you really don’t want Snape as your enemy. No one does. Oh, he flipped his hair again. So hot. *sigh* Filch is like…freakishly happy about that student out of bed thing. *gasp* C’est la Mirror d’Erised. Oh, wow, I love how they included the text in the movie exactly the way it was in the book. That makes me so happy. LILY!!!!!!!! JAMES!!! =D =D =D =D =D =D =D =D It’s your mummy. You don’t remember me! Well, at leas the actors look like they could be Harry’s parents, despite the fact they are supposed to be 21, not like 35 or whatever age those actors are. “I look good.” Okay, Ron. Whatever. You don’t become Quidditch captain or head boy. Maybe if you’d gone back to school. Instead you go off chasing Horcruxes and become all emo and leave Harry and Hermione. But then you marry Hermione. And have two kids. And take a driving test. And……LOL, okay. Basically the mirror means NOTHING, Ron. Ha! “It does not do well to dwell on dreams Harry and forget to live.” I love that line. And I love Richard Harris as Dumbledore. He was so much better. HEDWIG!!!! Waaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!!! You’re gonna die. So many people use that flying in the snow scene in tribute videos for Deathly Hallows, and now it will forever make me cry. Wow, okay. Suddenly all that snow disappeared. Bahahaha, even at this age Ron and Hermione are arguing like the adorable, almost perfect couple they are. “We know about the Sorcerer’s/Philosopher’s Stone.” “Oh.” Norbert! Well, Norberta! Aww, isn’t the little dragon just so adorable? Granted, I’d never keep one as a pet, but I do have to admit they are incredibly cute. Just they could burn down my house. Or burn off my hair. So, yeah, not keeping one. Sorry Hagrid. “Qua!!!!” Of course McGonagall’s not gonna miss a chance to punish a Slytherin. Filch is PERFECT. Great acting. “Good god man, you’re not still on about that dragon are you?” “Yeah, but what if he don’t like Romania? What if the other dragons are mean to him? He’s only a baby, after all.” Great interaction. Poor unicorns…they’re so pure and innocent, why would you want to kill one? Oh, yeah. You are evil and you want to live. And you lost all your Horcruxes. Harry, it’s Quirrelmort! That’s a hint! *pokes Harry hard in the back* Hint, hint!!!! I wonder if anyone ever counts this event as an escape from Voldemort. Well, probably not, since FIRENZE saved him. Huh, for 2001, those centaurs are pretty dang good. “You are safe now.” Uh, NO, he’s not. And he won’t ever be. “You don’t think he’ll try to kill you, do you?” NO, RON!? He’s not! *rolls eyes* Yeah, but, Hermione, Dumbledore won’t always be around. In fact, he is killed by Snape in just five years. And Harris dies next movie. How sad. (Note: I keep hearing sirens from Melissa’s in New York) “How often do you come across a three-headed dog?” NEVER, Hagrid. Oh, hey, it’s the Grey Lady again, I think! See, Hermione, Dumbledore’s gone! Hermione’s face…LOL. Dun, dun, dun. It’s Snape and he heard them talking about him… “*gasp* TREVOR!” What’s Ron holding right there? Oh, it’s the cloak, I think. Duh, Kat. *slaps self on head* Oh, they messed up Devil’s Snare, too. I mean, it’s okay and everything, but you weren’t supposed to relax. And it was fire, not sunlight. Oh, and they messed up the key scene, too. The keys didn’t attack Harry in the book, they were just really, really hard to catch. “Well, it was worth a try.” Yes, Ron, all those keys are there but a simple Alohamora will work. Right. Seriously, where does Harry get these nice Muggle sweaters from? “This complicates things a bit.” No, doy, Ron. Wow, that’s a lot of keys. “As for me, I’ll be a knight.” Go, Ron. This is one thing you are actually really good at! I really like the chess scene in the movie, it was done really well, even with the crappy 2001 special effects. “Yes, Hermione. I think this is going to be EXACTLY like wizard’s chess.” LOL. But Ron really played this game really well. He managed to play it so only he had to get hurt. But it is quite obvious that it would be difficult for one person to do this on their own. “No, you can’t!” I love you Ron, you can’t die! “Not me, not Hermione, YOU.” Oh, wow, look how scared Ron looks! Oh, no, Ron’s dead already. *rolls eyes* They left out Hermione’s scene, though. I loved that part of the book. “Books and cleverness. There are more important things. Friendship and bravery.” I agree. Harry’s walk down the steps was filmed really well. Amazing. Quirrelmort! “Tell the truth.” Just like in Half Blood Prince. Oh, that Voldemort face is creepy. That’s some powerful stuff there, offering to bring back his parents. “Alas. Earwax.” I love this: as long as you are going to be breaking the rules, do something Dumbledore thinks is cool so he’ll give you all the points so you can win the cup. Yes, Draco, Harry is a gazillion times better than you. Deal with it. NEVILLE!!!!! Probably the only points he ever won for Gryffindor! YAY! I love how Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw are just happy that Slytherin didn’t win. Funny. Aww, baby Harry. “Dudley” I love how Hagrid said that. Aww, it’s over. How sad. Bye, Hagrid!!!!! Dooo dooodoodoodoodooooooo. (my attempt at theme music) LONG movie. I’ve been sitting in this chair for 2 and a half hours. *dies*

Happiness is...

Inspired by my BEAUTIFUL friend Chickadee: To me, this is what HAPPINESS IS...

Leaky Friends

After reading a post that Chickadee made in the Common Room today, I suddenly got the urge to write about how thankful I am to have all my Leaky friends. Get ready for a long read (like anyone really reads this), because I have a lot to say.

I'll probably start with Chickadee. Perhaps it's just me, but I feel that the two of us have become really close. She's so sweet and caring. She actually listens to (reads) the posts I make, unlike a lot of the people in the Loft. I feel like she understands me, too. I don't have that many real friends, just people who hang around with my friends so it looks kind of like they are my friends. So I don't have that many people that i can just sit down and have a nice good TALK with, and all they do is LISTEN, without walking away or getting distracted or ignoring me. I always feel so much better if I come home and see a post from her. Of all my friends I've met on Leaky over the past 4 months, I feel closest to her! And, of all of them, she is the one I most want to meet in person sometime, even if it means I have to travel out to North Carolina to do it! Hey, I've never been there, so why not!

Hmm, next would probably be Jeff. He's actually closer in age to me, though I don't feel as close to him. He's brilliant, and the main reason I love him is because he's a teenage guy and a fan of Harry Potter. Really, I don't meet many of teenage guys who are obsessed with Harry Potter, so I really admire him. =D He, too, listens to what I say and pays attention.

Then, there's voldyhate'r. Unfortunately, she seems to have been captured by World of Warcraft or some video game like that so I don't see her very much anymore. But we are the SAME AGE, which is always a plus.

Sethtaylorsummer would probably be another Lounger that I feel close to. We aren't in the same reading group, unfortunately, and she has a lot of work taking care of her kids. But I always have interesting, enlightening conversations.

Of course, I feel I am friends with all of the people who hang out in the Lily&Stag Inn, that was just a quick list of those who I feel closest to. We all have connections. Yes, we all love Harry Potte (duh), but we also all love analyzing books or we wouldn't have joined the reading groups. We all share quite a lot of information on our lives, so I suppose that shows we like to interact with other people!

Anyway, as I said at the beginning of this post, I am VERY thankful to have all of my Leaky friends. They mean so much to me! I try to imagine life back before I found the Lounge...and I can't! I must have been so bored! I didn't have nearly as many people to talk to! I hardly ever feel truly lonely anymore, because there’s almost always someone on Leaky when I sign on! I am so grateful to have all these people who find what’s going on in my life interesting. I’m not used to it, but I’ve learned to dismiss that fact and just love it. What I really want now is to be able to meet them sometime! The Lounge has changed my life in so many ways, the first, obviously, being that it gives me some interaction with other people who actually care about me and know who I am (my name), and I feel that I can tell anything.

Thank you, Leaky! And a big hug and thanks to all my friends and people who have talked to me and reached out to me! You don’t know how much you’ve contributed to my life! I love you ALL!